DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

57612759
During
one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, "How do
I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large
man sitting next to her so I said, "It depends. Is that your husband?"
In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this
question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind.

Here’s the answer: EVERY relationship has a cycle.

In
the beginning,you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their
call,wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling
in love with your spouse wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely
natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything.
That’s why it’s called "falling" in love… Because it’s happening TO
YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet."
Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were
just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and
happened TO YOU. Falling is love is easy. It’s a passive and
spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria
of love fades. It’s the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but
surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not
always welcome (when it happens),and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies,
instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary
with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will
notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in
love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At
this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the
right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of
the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with
someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their
spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for
fulfillment.

Extramarital
fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most
obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a
friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this
dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I’m not
saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON;
IT’S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING
love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It’ll NEVER just
happen to you. You can’t "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day
in and day out. That’s why we have the expression "the labor of love."
Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it
takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make
no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things
you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just
as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are
also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise
program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ..
you can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision".. . Not just a feeling.
"Though you cannot go back and make a brand new start, my friend.
Anyone can start from now and make a brand new end."

(Dr. John C. Maxwell)

Tinggalkan Balasan

Isikan data di bawah atau klik salah satu ikon untuk log in:

Logo WordPress.com

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Logout / Ubah )

Gambar Twitter

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Logout / Ubah )

Foto Facebook

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Logout / Ubah )

Foto Google+

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Logout / Ubah )

Connecting to %s